Not all those who wander are lost.J.R.R Tolkien
This saying could not be more true, I’ve always been of the opinion that wandering should be an acceptable life choice rather than being considered nomadic blether and a desperate call for attention.
I find it amusing that the chase is almost always more thrilling than the capture itself. It is the adrenaline of the moments that lead us to our catch that makes it worthwhile, however the society in general believes in reaching goals and set destinations as the true parameters of success. It is saddening that we have such little understanding of ourselves as individuals and what we truly want out of life. We are so quick to judge people who do things differently as compared to ourselves.
We are accustomed to compromising our entire being for the sake of morphing into a reality created by others that our own reality seems like a distant memory – faded in the colors others chose to paint us in. Self actualization is a scary thing I tell you, it brings you face to face with depths of yourself that you hadn’t the faintest idea existed.
It is what it is. Perhaps this is what they call a midlife crisis or was it existential crisis? Potato potahto same thing, right? I’d like to define this time in life as the time when you no longer have the energy to make lemonade out of the lemons life’s thrown at you and you’re starting to question the lemons on their sour disposition. (Pun intended)
Existential OCD is a very real thing and I feel most of us suffer from it on some level, we just don’t acknowledge it and those of you who do, more power to you. When you realize who you are as an individual, you experience a whirlwind of emotions questioning where and why you are at a certain place in your life. You understand yourself better and you realize what you’re willing to compromise and where you draw the lines. You are ready to take charge and make changes; you’re willing to improve your circumstances even if that means eliminating toxic waste from of your life.
Some of us are still figuring ourselves out – We’re still finding out what makes us click. You might not want to settle and live a sedentary life or you’d rather stay in one place and have one partner or you could have multiple partners and not want to get married. Maybe you want to pursue higher learning and travel around the world?. You have to learn to accept yourself for who you are and your needs and requirements before you embrace what life has to offer.
You cannot find contentment unless you are sure of yourself and how you wish to lead your life, otherwise you’ll just pile up regrets. Self love comes from a place of self reflection and you learn that with time and experience, but once you do, it can be liberating, and overwhelming at the same time. Whatever your calling may be, it is uniquely you. Own it.