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Karma Chameleon

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I absolutely love this song by the Culture Club – it's a part of my childhood. It also happens to be the name of my blogpost today. Here's the link to it if you wish to hear it:

 

So here's the thing, I've come to one realisation in life: Karma is a bitch with an itch. What goes around almost always comes around and when it does, it bites you hard, harder than anything you've ever imagined.

So when you're out their screwing around with other people's lives like it's child's play, just be assured that it's going to come back and haunt you. This is no rant, or well maybe it is, just a tiny bit perhaps…hehe. I've seen so many people do such horrible things to other people not realising the consequences of their actions, and the funniest thing is, those same people are the ones who are completely in over their heads. They are so delusional, they think everything is about them, they're self obsessed in the most literal sense of the word.

They try to hurt you once, then they try to hurt you again, after that when they see that you are no longer beneficial to them in any way, they leave, very conveniently to only come back after some time with their same douchebaggery (pardon my French) knocking on your door like nothing happened. That's the most hilarious part of it by the way it, because that is when Karma kicks in.

Yep, that Karma chameleon is doing its mojo, I don't know what the Culture Club mean't by the Karma Chameleon in their very famous eighties song, but this is how I perceive the word and am using it. So anyway, the Karma chameleon is a champ like that okay? because you see, you just have to sit back and enjoy the show while it lasts.

Now, I'm not the least bit sadistic, don't just take my word for it, the people who know me personally know what kind of a person I am, and they respect me and admire me for it, however, I believe in fairness, and justice, so therefore, I strongly believe that when somebody decides to take interest in your life again, even after knowing what an absolute insult it is to themselves and the person that they're trying to touch bases with, you should just let that be, just the way it is and not do anything about it.

Being a forgiving, considerate and soft individual is great, but forgiveness doesn't mean that you have to forget. So when someone tries to get in touch with you out of the blue, you don't necessarily have to respond the way they want you to, in fact, you don't have to respond at all! You know why? because forgiveness doesn't always mean that you wish to keep ties with the person.

It's just about being a bigger person, letting things go and moving forward, it has nothing to do with communication, no matter what anyone says about "forgiveness is forgetting" and that you can't truly forgive someone without forgetting what they did, that is not true. You can be a bigger person by forgiving, but you have the choice of not indulging yourself in the same situation again. It differs from person to person, but this is just my take on it.

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What Is Happiness?

Have you ever asked yourself what happiness means to you? Like just taken a moment to think about the stuff that truly matters in life? Is happiness a fleeting moment or something much more?

I'm not going get into the happiness isn't based on material needs mumbo jumbo because that is subjective. Every human being has their own definition of contentment – their contentment might lie in splurging and going on a shopping spree. I've done so, more than my share if I may add. *hides face*

Can you be happy in making someone else happy? Even briefly? Can you find pleasure in being sadistic and hurting others? Both could equally be true; the making of a modern paradox. There are some human beings who I'd like to think, perhaps; circumstantially, take pleasure in being sadistic – in being happy in a fleeting moment with one person but at the same lying to themselves that their thirst for being with other people is satiated.

Some men and women just can't function with monogamy. That's happiness for them, and it's perfectly alright. We all have the free will to be as we please.

Happiness for me? Is the simple things that make the bigger picture – cuddles with my lover, sipping Irish Creme coffee knowing very well that I can't take too much caffeine!

Sitting with my parents/parents-in-laws going deep into the past, talking about the simpler less technologically sound times. Also, wanting the same kind of childhood for my kids in the future. Having a plate full of 'Biryani' that 'Aiyan' (my childhood nanny) has made for me. Playing with my African Grey and giving him kisses and seeing my Indian Ringneck get jealous and fighting for my attention. These are the little things that bring happiness on a day to day basis, as we move forward in life, we must stop dwelling in the past, for the past is gone and what lies ahead is a part of the present, which is why it is a gift.

What are the things that make you happy?

Share them with me in the comments section. Comment below!

Spellbound


– Wishing Column at Hagia Sophia in Istanbul, Turkey.

I've written so much about love, affection and emotional intelligence over the course of time that (oddly enough) people consider me a veteran in the matters of the heart. What they don't know is that I've experienced the fragility of relationships in life in order to get to this point of understanding – and I'm much stronger and happier for having endured and weathered with grace and dignity.

Relationships don't just have to be romantic, they are formed on various wavelengths with different individuals. Some ties are spiritual. Sometimes, we connect with people emotionally and mentally while on the other hand there's a possibility of getting romantically inclined. Some bonds are so much more than mere lust and "love" in the most generic sense. They go deeper, farther than anything else that you may have ever experienced.

Such instances leave us bewildered for most part of our lives. When we experience a relationship like that in our life, we want to hold on to it, tight with all our might – tight enough to turn our knuckles white. Alas! We seldom can, such is the irony of life; as we know it. Even if we want to flash freeze those stolen moments we just can't because we almost never, I repeat, never realize that the time is now, the time is always NOW. You have to grab hold of what you have and make sure you keep it close when you have it, otherwise it slips out of your hand like grains of sand, and all that is left is an empty palm and an insatiable itch to relieve the emptiness inside your bare soul, and I'm afraid that burning desire enslaves us (you, me, all of us) for the rest of our lives as we move forward in different directions.

10 Things To Know Before Taking The Plunge

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  1. Are you sure you want a long-term commitment?
  2. Are you ready to make the sacrifices and take on the responsibilities that come with wedlock?
  3. Does your partner know and understand what your long-term goals are?
  4. Do you and your significant other have the same priorities/ mindset? You have to know if you’re both on the same wavelength.
  5.  Do you want to have kids? Clarify when and how many before committing to each other. If both of you are not on the same page, there’s room for potential arguments.
  6.  Expect a lot of pain and resentment in the beginning if you’re both equally affectionate. You’re both trying your best, the two of you will try to simmer down for the sake of the other, you’ll try not to hurt the other and yet manage to do so.
  7. The higher expectations you have the more disappointed you’ll get. Lower your expectations so that nothing surprises you.
  8. Don’t expect Disney fairy tales to be true. Your parents’ house would always be the house you grew up in, everyone has a different lifestyle, just know that you have to be flexible in order to be able to adjust in an entirely other setup that is unlike how you lived previously.
  9. You’ll have to have a big heart. You’ll have to learn to let go of hurtful things – harsh reality checks that you wouldn’t want to but would have to let go for the sake of it.
  10. Lastly, you’d have to focus a lot on the positive and discard the negative before it starts to rot and the stench spreads. You’ll have to make the effort to pull yourself and pull through.

Rantings of An Anxious 20 Something

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  1. Sometimes, it’s hard to even verbalize your thoughts – what you’re truly feeling. Your heart and head are almost never in the same place at the same time.
  2.  One moment your heart is thumping real fast, the next it’s a splitting headache – whatever the brain pleases to focus on.
  3.  You can’t remotely imagine explaining yourself to people. You’ve tried hard enough already and it’s an uphill battle every time. No one gets it (except the ones who actually suffer from anxiety themselves).
  4.  The “society” is cruel. I’m not jumping the gun, passing judgments and saying that everyone’s alike,  I’m talking about a major chunk of the “desi” Pakistani/Indian community that treats anxiety ridden individuals like people who need to be treated for major mental disorders and (God Forbid) see shrinks (like that’s a bad thing?!).
  5. Seeing a psychologist/psychiatrist is perfectly normal. There’s nothing wrong with talking things out with someone who’d be able to guide you better and understand your ordeal.
  6. Do not, I repeat, do NOT let the society dictate what and how you should feel. It’s their fault that they fail to comprehend basic human nature – It’s OKAY to not feel good some days. You don’t owe anyone anything.
  7. If you’re married or in a committed relationship and have an understanding partner, that’s a blessing. Talk things out with him/her. Don’t make the mistake of not disclosing your issues to your partner no matter how much your conventional desi mother or your older married cousin-sisters warned you of disclosing your personal details to your husband since it was bound to come haunting you later on in your married life.
  8. You need to surround yourself around individuals who support you and get you through your phases. Avoid negativity at all costs.
  9. Distract. Distract. Distract!. Distract yourself as much as you can from letting your thoughts get to you. Pray and meditate. Exercise, read new books, unwind and just don’t let your mind go into overdrive. Over-thinking is your enemy, you have to win this battle.
  10. Last, but not the least….stay put, stay positive and keep calm. Just remember that it’ll all be fine. God helps those who believe.

Cerebrating Pony Ride

 

 

How does one express oneself when they don't have an outlet to blow off steam? How do you express yourself when the walls are closing in on you?. Have you ever been in a situation where you're not even sure how you feel about the entirety of it – how did you even get there and why?

All those books of the self-help variety should've been the least bit "helpful" when they reiterated and underlined the "no regrets in life" extracts. You're thankful for one thing at one moment and the next, you're just wondering where you went wrong. Is it wrong to love thyself and perhaps also another – the unforgivable, untouchable, alas! unattainable?

Perhaps modern day Shakespearean tales persist amidst the mundane, and maybe, just maybe some of us will always be misfits who shall for most parts of their lives remain a tad bit crooked to fit the puzzle. Transitioning to new dimensions is as good as your next delusion about the fairytale you imagined would embrace you at the edge of it. If only we could pick and choose our metamorphosis, fight and win these battles for ourselves and not let others decide our fate. In the end we're just horses running in the race against time and space, ponies charging against the wind, winning battles for the sake of it.